OK, I know it has been a dog's age since I last posted, but Jen's trip to Halifax left me rather inspired, so here goes...

I hate hotels and the people who work and stay at them!!!

Here is a countdown of 10 Do's and Don'ts when staying in a hotel...

10. DO NOT sit on the top blanket on the bed without the understanding that the last guest may have had their stinky, sweaty, nasty bare ass sitting on this blanket while either changing or having sex (with themself or someone else).

9. DO NOT sit on the floor.

8. DO NOT touch the mouthpiece of the phone to your mouth! You don't know where it has been.

7. DO Make sure you use the bags that come with the ice buckets. You don't know when that has last been cleaned.

6. DO NOT insult or complain about the maids until you leave. It is like sending food back in a restaurant... you could end up with a spit burger!

5. If you have to change rooms, DO be nice to the people that are moving you. Once again, the spit burger thing.

4. DO NOT drink from the glasses (or coffee pot) in the room! These are usually washed in the room by the cleaning staff. Have you ever seen hotel cleaning staff with dish soap? Also, when they go into the bathroom to clean, how many cloths do they bring with them? Seems to me the cloth that "cleans" the dishes is the same one that cleans the toilet.

3. DO bring your own plastic/styrofoam disposable glasses to the hotel, or get glasses from the kitchen.

2. DO say hello to your maid and give him/her a compliment or leave a tip. This can go a long way in making sure your room is extra clean -- or cleanER at least (I still wouldn't drink from the glasses).

And the number one thing that nobody thinks of when staying in a hotel...

WHAT IS THE FILTHIEST, MOST DISGUSTING THING IN MOST HOTELS? MORE DISGUSTING THAN THE TOILET AND I'D RATHER LICK THE BEDSPREAD THAN TOUCH MY MOUTH TO THIS...

1. DO NOT touch the TV remote control before first disinfecting it!!! Think about it... How often do the cleaners think to clean TV the remote? Does the TV in the hotel have PPV porn? How does one access this service? And what does one do when accessing this service? Do I really need to say more?

Well, that is all for me. I sure hope you can all stay in a hotel after reading this. Just remember one thing... germs are important. What doesn't kill us makes us stronger!